Gluesticks - ONE FOR THE GIRLS ( PART TWO )?

ONE FOR THE GIRLS ( PART TWO )?

IF YOU HAVE NOT READ PART ONE PLEASE READ THAT FIRST THIS IS THE CONCLUTION IT DID NOT FIT ON ONE PAGE BEST TO COPY PAST IT READ LATER ALTOGETHER The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend. Its sooo painful, but I really don't care. "IT WORKS!! It works!!" I get a hearty Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip...it's not! I touch. I am touching wax. I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake...remember my foot is still propped up on the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down. SEALED SHUT!!!! MY BUTT IS SEALED SHUT! SEALED SHUT!!!! I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself "Please don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off!" What can I do to melt the wax? Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right??? WRONG!!!!!!!****** I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit. Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together, is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub...in scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax. So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented myself to the porcelain!! God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!! I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter...... "So, my butt and hoo-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!" There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located, "Are we talking cheeks or hole or hoo-ha?" She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box. YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night. While we go through various solutions. I resort to trying to scrape the wax off with a razor Nothing feels better than to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!! By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm pretty sure I'm going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this event. My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and. OH MY GOD!!!!!!! congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair.... THE HAIR IS STILL THERE......ALL OF IT! So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point. Next week I'm going to try hair color......

Public Comments

i still feel the pain!
I know you said this is a story for girls, but we need more of your crazy stories hahaha bravo!
Ha ha! My story probably isn't as painful as yours, but it's kind of funny. I used one those wax strips on my leg, and I got all wax just stuck to it. I didn't want to carry on because i didn't wax all over my legs. Then, my mum revealed to me that I had to go and meet some family friends on the beach. So I went and got sand stuck ALL over my wax patch on my leg! So, after the beach (thank-fully nobody noticed the blue sandy patch, ha ha!) I tried to rub off the wax with a flannel, which was so painful and was like, ripping my skin! So, I thought, hey, I'll leave it because it's not going to come off, maybe it will just gradually ease of by itself. So I put my jeans on but then it hit me. They were skin tight jeans, I knew the evening to come was going to be a bad one!
You just convinced me to stay hairy down there....lol.
Oh poor you !!!! I'm still laughing - you have a real talent for storytelling - keep em coming. x
haha absolute fantastic
ooooh staying away from wax
Oh boy...I have some of them wax strips! I don't think I'm ever going to use them again :D I remember the last time I used them, just before Nottinghill Carnival and I was wearing shorts as well! I ended up having a quick bath and shaving since the wax was stuck to my leg :( Not the best bath I ever had!